There are so many women who lose sight of who they are once they have kids. They become everything to everyone else, but fail miserably at meeting their own needs. Not surprisingly, overtime this begins to affect their self esteem and self- confidence. The following are a few tips intended to help mommy get her swag back
1. Determine what motherhood means to you. So many moms out there believe that in order to be a good mom they have to recreate as many Pinterest crafts with their children as possible, make nightly home cooked meals with the perfect ratio of carbs and protein, and spend at least three hours bonding with Junior so that he becomes properly attached. There’s nothing wrong with doing these things. However, let’s face it, our children will still screw up, fall in love with the wrong people, and make dumb decisions no matter how much of our lives we devote to providing them with the illusion of a pristine childhood. Cut yourself some slack and figure out how you can be the best mom you can be without sacrificing who you are.
2. Spend time with friends who don’t have children. There is no rule that says moms must only spend their time with other moms. Having children does not mean that your life is reduced to Mommy and me yoga and awkward playdates. When moms get around other moms, their natural inclination is to talk about kids and all things kids-related. Every now and then, make plans with your friends who don’t have children. They will likely have a range of topics to discuss over dinner that does not include potty training or the color of poop.
3. Keep up with the times. Many moms dedicate the majority of their day to the tasks of cooking, cleaning, and crafting. They don’t have time to keep up with things like Congress or the Kardashians. However, it is important that you find ways to remain relevant. This doesn’t mean that at the next family barbecue you have to bust out the Schmoney dance. (Although you would definitely earn some major cool points in my book). Start out small. Reconnect with topics that interested you prior to having children. Maybe you were into fashion or politics. Grab a magazine or go online and see what folks are saying. Being informed about current events isn’t just about being in the know. Carving time out to keep up to date with things we find interesting allows us to stay connected to who we are. It also gives you something else besides children to talk about on date night and on girl’s night out!
4. Revamp your sense of style. Somewhere along the way, yoga pants and cardigans became go to fashion pieces for moms. Motherhood does not mean that you have to resign yourself to a life of frump. I’m a firm believer in the notion that when you look good, you feel good. Caring about your appearance isn’t a sign of vanity. It’s an act of self-love. When your children see you investing time in your appearance, you are modeling for them the importance of self-care.
5. Reconnect with your goals and dreams. Many women put their dreams on the back burner after they have children. There is nothing wrong with doing this for a little while. However, there comes a time when you will need to make yourself a priority and get back in the game. Getting in touch with your passions will rejuvenate your spirit by reminding you of who you are and where you want to be in life.
I hope this helps you on your journey to finding your mojo. Please feel free to share how you maintain your swag in the comment section below.
Photo credit: arinze